Miserable in this heat? Us, too! But sometimes all you can do is laugh at your problems. So in that spirit, here are some Northwest specific "It's so hot..." jokes for you to laugh with, groan at, and share.

It's So Hot... Jokes (Customized for the Northwest)

  • It’s so hot in Whatcom County, the cows are producing evaporated milk.
  • It’s so hot that even Starbucks iced-coffees are hot coffees.
  • It's so hot that even the Columbia Cup needs ice in it.
  • It’s so hot at Foster Farms, the chickens are laying fried eggs.

  • It’s so hot that even the Cable Bridge is cooling off in the Columbia River.
  • It’s so hot that weatherman Monty Webb just keeps quoting Paris Hilton.
  • It's so hot that the oil-painting you bought at Art Fest will be watercolor by the time you get home.
  • It’s so hot that Yoke’s Fresh Market is now Yoke’s Not-So-Fresh Market.

  • It’s so hot that Tillamook Ice-Cream is now just Tillamook Cream.
  • It’s so hot that Washington’s fish are grilling themselves.
  • It's so hot that Bikini Baristas are removing their pasties just to cool off.
  • It’s so hot that Papa Murphy’s take-n-bake pizza is ready by the time you get home.

  • It’s so hot at the Atomic Bowl cigar bar that the stogies light themselves.
  • It’s so hot that the Seattle Kraken now have swim-practice.
  • It’s so hot that Panera Bread is now Panera Toast.
  • It's so hot that Zip's has lost its Zip.

  • It’s so hot that men quit spending money on Only Fans and started spending money on actual fans.
  • It’s so hot that I’m ridiculing co-workers for the shade.
  • It’s so hot that people are going into sex shops to lower their temperature.
  • Its so hot that the popcorn at Les Schwab's is popping itself.
  • It's so hot that the Tri-Cities are melting into one city.

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